A proud parenting moment.

We went to the BX today. We needed pillows and a book and some supplements for Josh. We walked in and Thomas wanted nothing to do with holding hands, or being carried, riding in the cart, or even just helping push the cart. These are his four options for when we're at a store. Of course all he wants to do is run.

Since we got here we've been bribing him. At first it was just to get through the travel and hotel living...but it just kept going and Josh mentioned he was starting to see a spoiled trend in him. We knew it was our fault and our responsibility to nip that in the bud.

I really hate that phrase.

Anyway.

So there we are, and Thomas is shrieking, writhing on the floor absolutely appalled that we aren't allowing him to run like a madman. I understand his anger, I'm sure he isn't interested in pillows.
Now before we would have tried to distract him with a toy or book or candy or juice but we had agreed to not give in on this. He needs to learn what is acceptable in public.

We don't agree with spanking or time outs so we decided to try a few things I've learned from other moms and even a book or two.

So I held him, and spoke calmly in his ear. I told him that I knew he was angry and upset. He wanted to run but we said no. I told him his choices, hold hand, or go up. I told him I loved him. I told him that I wasn't going to hold him if he kicked me. Josh said all of these things too, we took turns. Rinse and repeat.

It was probably the first time we've worked together, in a consistent fashion and kept calm through the whole thing.

After about 10 minutes (although it felt much longer) and less stares than I thought we would get he calmed down. He sat in the cart and drew pictures with a pen and paper I keep in my purse.
We moved on and smelled a bunch of candles, he loves smelling them. We played peek a boo at the checkout. He held my hand from the BX to the shoppette with no fight at all. We made sure to tell him how happy we are when he holds hands so nicely and that he was doing a great job being a big boy. So we let him hang out in the toy aisle hitting every button he could reach but even when it was time to leave he didn't melt down or fight us.

I'm sure we'll have to repeat that scene but I'm just really proud of us. I feel like we're hitting our stride working as a team. I'm so lucky that I have a husband who wants to parent with me, who brought up something he didn't like and came up with a plan with me to fix it. He's a great Daddy.