I've tried to keep a positive attitude. I've been holding back the tears for the past few days but I can't keep it in anymore. Josh just called to say that housing is full now and we have to live out in town.
I did NO research on where to live because it's a regulation that we had to live on base.
I'm aching to be around other people. I need a friend. If we live out in town we will more than likely be surrounded by Japanese speaking people. The past few years everyone has had to live on base and I was taking so much comfort in that. I don't want to be lonely here. I don't want to be aching to go home. Especially because it's not nearly as easy to visit anymore.
I'm not made for this. I'm not a world traveler. I don't enjoy new things or adventures. All I ever wanted was a family of my own in the town I grew up in.
I'm the mom, the wife, I'm supposed to hold it all together and I'm falling apart. I'm the one that has to get a license and drive Josh around for the first month and that is keeping me up at night.
Josh keeps calling me but my phone drops him everytime. I can't figure out how to work the damn thing anyway.
I'm scared. I'm lonely. I'm tired.
I just want to be at home.
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